Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me

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  (734): I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me http://tfl.nu/ldou
  Replies (5) Good night (779) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay

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  (646): My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay http://tfl.nu/aqwf
  Replies (6) Good night (819) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.

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  (559): my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too. http://tfl.nu/gf0r
  Replies (10) Good night (4672) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.

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  (814): We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation. http://tfl.nu/gj2w
  Replies (17) Good night (4300) Bad night (1281)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog

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  (908): you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog http://tfl.nu/njtd
  Replies (6) Good night (1381) Bad night (3126)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave

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  (630): all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave http://tfl.nu/0ff9
  Replies (10) Good night (2973) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.

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  (630): We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas. http://tfl.nu/1h9b
  Replies (14) Good night (6100) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.

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  (608): hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink. http://tfl.nu/2o9s
  Replies (4) Good night (1296) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.

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  (604): He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there. http://tfl.nu/lavl
  Replies (10) Good night (2123) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen

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  (734): i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen http://tfl.nu/gv17
  Replies (12) Good night (1681) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I just really need a hug and a shower beer

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  (512): I just really need a hug and a shower beer http://tfl.nu/4ssr
  Replies (5) Good night (1015) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man

  (1-714): View more from California

  you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife

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  (714): wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man (1-714): you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife http://tfl.nu/week
  Replies (2) Good night (872) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you

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  (504): No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you http://tfl.nu/ma8s
  Replies (2) Good night (508) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.

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  (404): I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now. http://tfl.nu/5tyu
  Replies (1) Good night (293) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire

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  (909): I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire http://tfl.nu/2hlt
  Replies (0) Good night (318) Bad night (610)

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