I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
