thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize