So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
