Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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