it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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