Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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