..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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