Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
