so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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