What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize