with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
