i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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