they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
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Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
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He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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