Sponge bath it is.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
