so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
