And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
why is half of my head shaved?
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