I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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