she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize