His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
