So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Terrible idea I love it
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
