all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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