i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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