U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
