i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
you never un-have a 4some
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize