you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
