My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize