She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
