I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
