She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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