idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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