ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize