do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
