i think my mom watched the whole time
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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