2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I am midnight drunk by noon
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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