He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
i out mim tonsoeep
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