are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
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just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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