Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize