Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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