girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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