dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
