ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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