Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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