You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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