I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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