i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
