You really coming over, don't trick.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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