She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I think my fart just growled at me.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
