So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
