i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
